As a Wellness and fitness coach I have my clients work on goal setting. I am a firm believer that health involves so much more than just your physical state. Its your mental health, spiritual health, nutrition, sleep, relationships, career, and life purpose. So as a coach, I strive to care for my clients as a "whole" for all things are woven together and impact your health! I do assign homework! Some clients are receptive, others not so much, but taking the time to write down thoughts, identify barriers, brain storm solutions, and setting goals is empowering!
What is it within us that creates emotional barriers, distractions, excuses, procrastination, and other habits that make it near impossible to show up consistently? For most people its FEAR. Fear of rejection, judgement, visibility. Wondering where that fear is coming from? There are three core human triggers: (1) not feeling safe (2) not feeling worthy (3) not feeling loved. So how do we overcome this?
Mindset Tip #1 Move through not feeling safe. First and foremost, know this is a natural and common response. Remember your brain was wired to get you out of harmful situations, like getting attacked by a bear! Your brain activates this fight-or-flight response without any initiative from you. When the body senses danger, the sympathetic nervous system kicks in. It signals your brain to pump stress hormones like epinephrine, preparing your body to either fight for survival or to flee to safety. We have all felt this! Your heart starts racing, your pupils dilate, your palms may become sweaty. Now, here is where we have the capability to shift our mindset and practice feeling safe, It's important to be aware that your mind will seek out confirmation for what you're feeling and thinking. So, if you practice feeling at peace you'll see peaceful experiences in your environment. Let's put this into action! To start practicing this process of feeling safe, regularly journal what feeling safe feels like in your body, as well as what it looks like to you personally. Affirm to yourself: "it's safe to be visible" "it's safe to speak my truth" Practice that until you align with it emotionally. Every time you feel a sense of discomfort, refocus on feeling safe, reframe your thoughts and ask yourself "what's the BEST that could happen?" Finally, begin taking action! Start little by little until you increase your courage and confidence!
Mindset Tip #2 Move through not feeling worthy. Worthiness is an inside job! No one and nothing outside of you will ever make you feel worthy if you don't believe it. First things first, reframe what worthiness means to you. What does it look like? What does it feel like? After that, start to make some shifts so your valuing your time, creating space for things you care about, and taking care of your mental and emotional health. Simply put, do things that make you feel good. Call it self-care, call lit self-love...whatever you call it doesn't matter. Just do things that help you relax your physical body and feel in alignment with something bigger than you. To do this, a lot of people journal, meditate, run, or listen to music that inspires them. For those of you who know me well, you know how much I love quotes and words of affirmation! I find words to be so powerful and use them in my daily practice. Reaffirm that we are all worthy of a life well lived, worthy of love, worthy of fulfillment, worthy of respect, and worthy of growth!
Mindset #3: Move through not feeling loved. Comparison, self-judgment, shame and self-loathing are all LOW vibrational feelings and aren't doing you any favors to dwell in. The first thing I call my clients to do is to dig deeper and explore the real reason they are feeling this way. If this is where your mind and heart are going, then you may be called to do some soul searching and healing work that includes letting go, forgiveness, acceptance and surrender. Self-love affirmations that I love: "I am worthy of love" "I am loved for exactly who I am" "I deserve love and I open my heart to it" "I am worthy of a healthy and loving relationship" " I am at peace with where I am right now on my life journey" "I choose to accept myself unconditionally."
One last closing thought about growth mindset. Success, whether it be with your fitness, career, relationship, or health goals, begins with believing you can achieve them! Here's a quick chart for little shifts in self-talk.
I can't do this ----- I am still learning and I will keep trying
I am afraid of making a mistake-----Mistakes are how I learn and grow
This is too hard-----With more practice, it will get easier
I give up-----I will try a different way
I don't know how-----I can learn how
I am not good at this -----What can I learn to get better at this
They are better at it than I am-----What can I learn from them.
I hope that as you read this something in you sparked or excites you! Part of healing is identifying what's holding us back. As a wellness and fitness coach I have seen clients who just feel stuck. I am a firm believer that it's not who you are that holds you back, it's who you think you're not. Let's aim this week to focus on shifting our thought, to feeling safe, worthy and loved.
Much love,
Katie
RN, CPT, Wellness Coach
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